THE ENIGMATIC SOUL

               The room was frighteningly dark, dim lighted with the burning white candles circling the Ouija board. The guy in white tee- Rakesh had kept his right hand on the transparent glass filled with smoke. He was to my right while to my left was Pankaj whispering someone's name with a devilish smile on his face. Even though the silence of the room was fearsome I couldn't hear the continuous whispers of Pankaj and Rakesh. I strained my ears to hear their voices clearly. As a result I could hear an indistinct voice. They were calling out the spirit of a familiar name...

"Nihal , Please come and talk to us."

"Nihal, please come. We mean no harm."

"Nihal!"

The voices eventually became louder and clearer, deafening my ears. I could feel my eyes getting heavy, their calling of my name enervating me every passing moment. And finally I lost consciousness and fell to ground!

***

The nightmare, or whatever it was, woke me up with a start at 6 am in the morning. The 3 years old friends appearing suddenly in a nightmare in such a way made me uncomfortable. I had left my hometown, Nangal and all the childhood memories few years ago because of the fat salary IT job at Noida. I really missed my friends and my parents back at my hometown but I couldn't go and meet them. The recession in the industry had made things difficult for me. Giving the reason of incompetence I was fired from my job and I was badly in search of a new one. Along with this trouble there were some more things that troubled me, a thing very significant...

After getting done with my daily chores as usual, I set out in search of job, the old fashioned way, dropping by at small scale industries to submit my resume, attend the interviews and await my result. As every normal day I stepped out of my home and started walking up the narrow lane as I realized a girl watching me. I looked up at her and our eyes met for a split of second. She was a young beautiful girl about my age. She seemed new in the locality, moved in yesterday, I guessed. She wore pink top and a matching pajama. The overall appearance seemed pleasant but something was mysterious in her smile and the unflinching stare at me. I took away my eyes from her and walked down the lane but my mind wondered about the girl and it felt as if her eyes still followed me. I paced up a little trying to get away from her sight as soon as possible.

The evening I returned back to home after no success as usual, dropping by my resume and running around in the scorching summer. As I stepped in through my door the thoughts of the morning girl came gushing to my mind. I turned around to look across the road at her balcony where I had seen her in the morning. There was no one for a moment but as I was about to return to my door, she emerged from within. Surprisingly she looked straight up at me and the mysterious smile flashed on her lips. May be it wasn't suspicious at all, maybe it was just my imagination, but something within me made me worry.

The next morning I walked down the lane till the bus stand and waited for my bus. Surprisingly, the new girl came at bus stop and stood few feet away from me.

"Even though she looks pretty Indian girl she is quite bold to stalk and follow me!" I foolishly thought.

While these thoughts were circling in my mind I checked her out. Even though she freaked me out yesterday by her enigmatic smile, something in her caught my eye today. She was strikingly similar to someone I knew. She reminded me of my past. The paradoxical moment demanded my eyes to look at her and get lost in her beautiful similarity, while my mind strived hard to vanish away from the place. But I guess the luck favored my eyes because the very next moment I was brought to present by her. She was asking me the bus for Gautam Buddha Nagar. When I was back to my senses I heard her clearly and looked at her with raised eyebrows. She was enquiring about the place I had to go, the events of coincidences and the similarity was troubling me a lot.

"The bus number 41 goes to Gautam Buddha Nagar; even I'm waiting for that bus." I said and wondered why gave in the extra detail about myself.

"Cool! Then I can wait here with you. I hope you don't mind" she excitedly said with a big wide smile.

"Nay, Not a problem!" I said.

"Hi! I'm Lata" she said extending her hand. "And I stay opposite to your building, I guess" she added with a wink.

I was flabbergasted by her boldness. "Hello I'm Nihal" was my meek response. I warned myself to avoid any further talk with this girl. But somehow she had captivated me with her eyes and looks.

"Friends?" she asked "Since I'm new to this area you are my first friend in need and a friend indeed!" She crackled at her own joke.

I didn't reply to her friendship or the poor joke. By that time bus had arrived and we boarded the bus. Lata promptly sat beside me and pulled her handbag in her lap. As she did so a bracelet of small skulls peeped out of her handbag. She noticed my bewildered look and casually pushed it inside saying," It's gifted by one of my friend in West Bengal because I'm fascinated by black magic and such stuff!" My heart missed a beat after hearing this. She just gave me another reason to stay from her!! My intuitions were right. And now that she was following me I had to be alert...

"So do you believe in ghosts and evil? Have you experienced it?" I inquired cautiously.

"Yes I believe in ghosts and evil. If there can be God if there is good, there has to be bad, there has to be evil. But even though I strongly believe it I haven't experienced it yet!" she answered.

I was uncomfortable with this absurd topic and wanted it to end it as soon as possible, and somewhere back in my mind I cursed myself for asking the question! Fortunately my stop was about to come next and I got up from my seat and stood in queue to alight. As I got down from the bus Lata waved me bye and smiled her usual mysterious way, which had become more mysterious since our talk in bus, I felt.

The whole day I thought about Lata. HOW COULD SHE BE SO SIMILAR TO MEGHA??? And why she had to meet me? If she was a bit taller and had a bit shrill voice I would have mistaken her for Megha. Or is she Megha herself? No she can't be. Megha was tall and she is down all the way in Jabalpur. She left me... she left me 3 years ago. Why will she comeback now? With all these chain of thoughts in my mind I wandered aimlessly and returned home in the evening.

Next morning I decided to take a break and stay at home. The whole day I remained nostalgic about my blessed childhood and my journey till date. I couldn't stop myself from cherishing the moments with Megha. I thought of her over and over, cried a lot and boozed along.

The third morning I stepped out of my home with my gaze straight at Lata's house. I hurried a bit as I was late than usual. At bus stand I was greeted by Lata. She seemed worried.

"Hello Nihal! You were missing yesterday. I didn't see you here in the morning and thought you would be at home and I could see you at your home in the evening. But I didn't find you. Had you been somewhere?" Lata greeted and loaded me with numerous questions.

"Hello Lata. Actually I was a bit low yesterday." I replied shortly.

The bus came and we got in it. Just like previous day the enthusiastic Lata kept the conversation alive till I got down at some place. And this series of events would go on daily. At times she was mysterious and at few she was innocent girl. As we got to know each other I realized her deep and firm belief in black magic. She had started practicing it recently without the knowledge of her parents and shared her experience each day with me. I tried a lot to stay away from her as she reminded me of my sad past and I feared the kind of girl she was. But I guess her witchy things had captured my mind and made it hard for me to push her away. The way she had started getting possessive and over caring worried me.

It was 7th Dec and Lata's birthday. She had declared to celebrate it with me in the evening. I had agreed to it since I did not want to dishearten her. On the same afternoon I had received an interview call from a MNC. I was overwhelmed and reached her house a bit earlier in the evening to receive her. Over the dinner I told her about my interview the next day. Lata was in high spirits.

"This birthday is memorable. I am glad you are here with me. I have to tell you something but let us first have a selfie!" she said excitedly.

"I am not photogenic. Please do not mind but let us avoid the selfie and you tell me what you have to say." I replied.

Lata got angry at my reply and stayed quiet. I goaded her to tell me what she had to say but even she refused to tell it then. We were done with our celebration and the party had ended in a sour way. I had to prepare for the interview so we rushed back to our respective homes immediately.

"I will tell you what I had to say tomorrow morning." She said and winked while parting away.

Next morning I freshened up and walked up to bus stand. Lata was eagerly waiting for me. I was anxious about what problem she had to share. Earlier I had helped her with many of her problems but this time she was behaving weird. Might be it was a grave one.

"Hey Nihal, Good morning!" she greeted me.

"Good morning!"

"You are looking nice in this new formal attire. Are you prepared well? Best of luck"

"Thanks! Err... you had something to say", I reminded her of yesterday.

"Well, it's a first day of my new year and I wanted to tell you something. Ummm...." She faltered a bit and continued, "I think I am in love with you."

There was a big silence.

"Lata we are good friends, let us not complicate it. Today is an important day for me and I don't want to have a bad start. I don't want to put you in some hopes so I'm saying it clearly that we can't be what you are wishing. I have a past which I haven't told you yet. But since you have broached this topic I will tell you everything in the evening. Now I have to focus on my interview so wish me luck cheerfully." I explained my side.

As my interview venue was at other route, I got down from the bus before Lata and bid her bye FOREVER. She was unaware of this fact, my past or present. She waved me back with a plain face. Her mysterious smile was missing...

***

Three years ago, on 7th Dec, Megha had texted me in the morning that she was in trouble. I tried calling her whole day but her cell was switched off. I couldn't meet her as she had visited her native place during the holidays. Finally at night she called me. She was speaking very softly as if being cautious of someone overhearing her. I asked her about her problem but she kept weeping continuously with broken sentences in between. But from whatever she said I could make out that her parents had discovered about our relationship and they had beaten her up. She was asked to choose between her parents and me. My heart started pumping furiously as if it would come out my chest. I awaited her response.

"So what did you answer? What is your decision Megha?" I almost yelled over the call.

She stopped sobbing, composed herself and finally said, "We have to end this. I can't leave my parents. You try to forget me. I'm sorry. "

I was numb, broken into thousand pieces. I had known Megha for the four years of my college. Once she decided something there was no way to turn her away from it. I was blank. I was already tensed because of my expelling from the job and the hard times and this was a great blow to me. I had my interview scheduled the next day. It was an important interview for me. I needed Megha's wishes and she had turned me away! I was dejected at my life. Megha had made her decision, I had to make mine.

I walked upto my desk, opened the drawer and pulled out a bottle of sleeping pills, took a handful of them and dumped in mouth.

I slept... away from the worries, the pain, the dejection and even love... My body stopped feeling these things but my soul couldn't abandon them. Since then my enigmatic soul lives in its own world, away from anything, anyone. No strings attached!